September 27, 2012 — Vince Gilligan

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The Colbert Report episode guide EPISODE NUMBER: 8155 (September 27, 2012)
GUESTS: Vince Gilligan
STAFF CAMEO: Tom Purcell
SEGMENTS: “America Again: Re-Becoming the Greatness We Never Weren’t” | Mitt Romney’s Sliding Poll Numbers | “Skewed” Presidential Polls | Vince Gilligan Pt. 1 | Vince Gilligan Pt. 2 | Sign Off - “America Again”
SUIT REPORT: Grey suit | Light blue shirt | Stripped navy tie
VIDEOS: Thursday, September 27, 2012

Don’t forget to head over to ColbertNation.com and vote in the ‘Stephen Poll-Bert’!!

Now folks, to spread my vision for America, I have already started my promo tour. For instance, all this week I’ve been on ‘The Colbert Report’. Next week I’ll be pushing the book on ‘Good Morning America’, ‘Anderson Cooper’, ‘Live with Kelly’, ‘Late Night with David Letterman’ and the opening credits of ‘Downtown Abbey’.

“America Again: Re-Becoming the Greatness We Never Weren’t”

  • Folks, I know what you’re thinking - ‘Stephen, you already wrote one book this year. How do you write them so fast?’ - Well here’s the trick, I use some words more than once.
  • Again, that’s Sunday at 9PM on the ‘Oprah Winfrey Network’. Ugh, some people have to name everything after themselves.
  • By doing this, I will be joining the ranks of such next chapterers as Lady Gaga, Usher, Jennifer Hudson, Gabby Douglas, Rhianna and 50 Cent. That by the way, is actually a picture Lady Gaga wearing a dress made out of those other people.

  • After spending the day with Lady O, I can confidently say that Oprah Winfrey is my new black friend.
  • I mean, I assume she’s black. I don’t see race, not even my own. People tell me I’m white, and I believe them because I’ve seen The Eagles live.

Mitt Romney’s Sliding Poll Numbers

  • With this election day looming, everyone is trying to read the tea leaves. Except Romney, who as a Mormon is allowed to only read the Caffeine Free Diet Coke.
  • Arkansas, come for the meth. Stay, because you traded your car for meth.
  • When a reporter ask if he was going to start campaigning harder, Romney responded, “Ha ha. We’re in the stretch aren’t we? Look at those clouds. It’s beautiful. Look at those things.”
  • Just look at those things. Look at those pretty clouds, that one kind of looks like a bunny. Or if you turn your head the other, crushing poll results.

“Skewed” Presidential Polls

  • [The election] is much closer among the extremely interested. And Romney’s tied when you focus on the inexpressably intrigued. And he’s up by two points when you count voters who are psychotically engaged.
  • Yes, there basing this all on scientific gobbledygook, which is also the name of Stuart Varney’s character in Harry Potter. Professor Poppycock Gobbledygook.
  • Tonight, I am so overly excited that I am conducting my own poll. So go to colbertnation.com and make your voice heard by answering this question:

Interview - Vince Gilligan

Stephen: I’m a little torn about this character [Walter White] because obviously, he’s the bad guy, right? He gets badder every day. But, he’s also a small business man. He’s a job creator. He built that!

Stephen: Is there really blue crystal meth out there?
Vince: There is now.
Stephen: *Head Desk*

  • Erika

    The show was beautiful last night, full of energy and fun and a really nice two-part interview. What made it even more wonderful was knowing that the entire time Stephen was exhausted and sick, which in and of itself isn’t wonderful, but the fact that he puts his heart and soul into that show to make it radiate life does. I only know that because my C-section pal wrote about it in her taping report (I’ll ask her about posting it over here).

    Normally he doesn’t talk much about his guest appearances on other shows, unless it’s part of a bit: like his on and off friendship with Jimmy Fallon, or the time Conan shot him. I think he decided to talk about Oprah mainly because he knew his character would HAVE to talk about being on Oprah’s show haha. I won’t be able to buy the book right away, BUT I signed up for my library’s first available copy when they get it, so at least I can read it then. In the meantime, I’ll probably make frequent visits over to Barnes and Noble to just sit and look at it :)

    I really really enjoyed the interview. I’ve never watched Breaking Bad myself, my husband does, and I always thought it looked too intense without enough redemption. I think there is a place in the world for those kind of shows, so I do think it looks good, it’s just not for me. Stephen asked really good, insightful yet hilarious, questions and I think Vince Gilligan enjoyed being there a lot.

  • Mrs Colbert the 2nd

    Ya, last night was wonderful (esp as I was actually there!), hopefully my taping ReporT will make it on here! I felt SO bad for Stephen with him being sick, my poor baby But an AWESOME experience from start to finish!

  • Katt

    @Mrs Colbert the 2nd

    Look forward to reading your taping report!! Glad you had an awesome time!!

  • Katt

    Did anyone else notice the flashing ‘Colbert’ sign hanging to the right of the audience as the camera panned around the back of the C-desk? Is that the one from the Colbchella stage, or am I just really slow on noticing it?

  • Mrs Colbert the 2nd

    Ya, it’s the one from Colbchella! It looks AMAZING in the studio!

  • Mr. Arkadin

    @Katt: Yes. I think it is the sign from Colbchella. And yes, you’re really slow in noticing it. :)

  • Mr. Arkadin

    I’m sorry to hear Stephen was so sick last night. Especially since I had such a great time watching the show. The two part Gilligan interview was great. (BTW: Has anybody read the story where it’s claimed that Romney’s top staffers call Paul Ryan “Gilligan” behind his back? I like that story.) I was surprised (and quite pleased) at how much of a fan of “B.B.” Stephen seemed to be. And the feeling seemed to be mutual.

    @Mrs. Colbert the 2nd: Could you tell us the behind-the-scenes story of the “guard my fountain” aside that lead off the show?

  • CN Helper

    I am soo sorry to hear that our Stephen is sick but seriously, I had no idea until Mrs. Colbert the 2nd indicated that. Poor guy. This is not good before his slew of appearances. I hope he feels better soon.

    Mrs. Colbert sent over her reporT so we will get that over to you shortly. She is hilarious!

    Katt, I talked about the light up sign in one of my ep guides… you mean you don’t read everything I post with rapt attention? *goes home to cry*

  • Katt

    @CN Helper

    I read every single word on this site, on occassion it has been known for me to forget some of them. I also have barely been able to watch a full show since Colbchella, so I am sure when I catch up I will notice on the ep it went up in.

  • Alex

    Yeah, the fountain gaurd thing was my fault. I’m working on a fountain gaurd costume and the friend that I went with boldly asked Stephen for a part of it…. Stephen said there is no such thing, but clearly there is…