EPISODE NUMBER: 10017 (November 4, 2013)
GUEST: David Folkenflik
SEGMENTS: Intro - 11/4/13 | Obamacare’s Gender-Blind Premiums | The Word - Inc. God We Trust | @RealHumanPraise for Fox News | Sign Off - Goodnight
SUIT REPORT: Black pin striped suit | White shirt | Light blue, dotted tie
VIDEOS: Monday, November 4, 2013

I don't want to see another network for the rest of the year. #PraiseFOX

— Real Human Praise (@RealHumanPraise) November 6, 2013

Rob Dubbin’s genius brainchild of @RealHumanPraise is taking robo-tweeting to whole new art form of spambot. It’s amazing how perfectly Rotten Tomatoes reviews and the show titles of all of our Fox & Friends mesh together in perfect satirical harmony. Kudos to Rob and the rest of the TCR staff for dreaming up what is sure to be a very entertaining twitter account.

The twitter feed was definitely the highlight of the episode, but we also had a stellar Word last night - I love when the closing line sums up the entire essay so concisely and profoundly as this one did. Not only are corporations people now, but they are also capable of having (and acting upon) religious beliefs! Although it is a topic worthy of debate - corporations dictate how they are run, so conceivably the realm of what healthcare they are willing to provide their employees could be considered part of their business model, or at least business culture. Let us know what you think.

Intro - 11/4/13

• They say a lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. Why did the truth have its pants off?

Obamacare’s Gender-Blind Premiums

• The true victim in this healthcare disaster are America’s most vulnerable: the men.

• See folks, until now, health insurance in America always struck a delicate balance: women paid higher premiums than men, and in return, men paid less. The system worked.

• Did you catch that? Under Obamacare, men will pay the same amount as women, and yet we still don’t get to pass a cantaloupe that has toenails through our genitals.

• Ladies love going to the doctor. Who knows why? Maybe they’re pretending their extras on Grey’s Anatomy. I don’t know they’re suckers for that stuff.

• Just the first step in Obama’s plan to get the whole country hooked on the pill. Personally, I suspect they’re slipping it into the drinking water already. Because I know I’ve been having some very light periods.

• Yeah, that’s what happens. Women get bitten by an insect, they lyme disease. A man gets bitten by an insect he becomes a superhero.

• Yeah, men only have the prostate. Meanwhile, women are like the Mines of Moria. You got the tube, the doo-dad, the Chicago Bull, you know, you got to squint to know what’s really going on down there. It’s like one of those magic eye posters. They say there’s a little man in a boat, but I never found it.

The Word - Inc. God We Trust

One of the victims of government-mandated contraception is Hobby Lobby….the nation’s largest rhyming-named craft supply business. [2nd: "Craft Shaft" 3rd: Glitter Sh*tter]

• [The Green Family's] business, Hobby Lobby, also believes life begins at conception. [And ends at crocheting.]

• Corporations struggle with the same existential questions with all do. [What does the fox say?]

• This country was founded on the principle for religious liberty of all people, be they Christian, Jewish, Buddhist, or limited liability formed under subchapter S of the United States tax code. [So, Lutheran?]

Remember folks, the purpose of religion is to answer the ultimate question: are we in control, or is some greater force pulling the strings? And if courts rule that corporations have the same religious rights as we humans do, I think we’ll have our answer. And that’s the Word.

@RealHumanPraise for Fox News

• Now Fox built its commenting army from the ground up, and from the thin air down.

• These days people get their news via the Twitter bird and Fox can’t police the Twitter-verse by themselves. So folks, I’m stepping in. One of my writers, Rob Dubbin, designed a Twitter algorithm or ‘bot’ to pick up where Fox News left off. Every 2 minutes, @RealHumanPraise takes a positive film review from Rotten Tomatoes and swaps in the names of beloved Fox News shows and personalities.

• Stephen’s favorite tweet so far: While you’re watching it, Hannity lives up to its title.

• Truer words have never been generated!

• Like Bill O’Reilly, [@RealHumanPraise] will just keep talking until someone pulls the plug.

Interview - David Folkenflik

Stephen: What’s so terrible about Rupert Murdoch? He’s a successful businessman. Is that your problem with him? Because he’s profit and you work for a nonprofit? Are you jealous? Is this jealousy?
David: Not so much. This is about a guy who I think is, in many ways, the most influential media figure in the English-speaking world. He’s a guy who -
Stephen: … Excuse me.