EPISODE NUMBER: 8127 (July 25, 2012)
GUESTS: Dan Gross
STAFF CAMEO: Jay Katsir (Jay the Intern)
SEGMENTS: Mitt Romney’s Anglo-Saxon Connection | Mitt Romney vs. Barack Obama on Small Business Owners | The Word - 1 Man Show | Bibles Swapped for “Fifty Shades of Grey”
SUIT REPORT: Dark suit | White shirt | Red/white tie
VIDEOS: Wednesday, July 25, 2012
I know he’s been in office for a few year’s now, but Barack Obama just doesn’t seem American to me. And you know what, Mitt Romney agrees with me. *insert crazy Mitt babble here* Yeah, he just seems foreign.
And I couldn’t figure out why, you know. Maybe it was his weird middle name, or his foreign dad, or the fact that Obama has a different … you know … way of moving his hand in front of his face.
Today Mitt is embarking on a world-wide tour of three countries - United Kingdom, Israel, Poland. He packed his bags, got his shots and strapped his dog to the roof of his jet.
Now the media gotcha-razzi are saying that ‘Anglo - Saxon’ is some sort of racial code word, as in White Anglo - Saxon Protestant. Ok, but Mitt’s campaign isn’t saying that he is a ‘WASP’, they never said ‘White’ or ‘Protestant’. They’re just saying that he is an ‘AS’.
And hey, I don’t see race, but I do see 6th Century Northern Germanic tribal association. I don’t even see my own race. People tell me I am a Celt and I believe them, because I am required to yoke the ox and to do boon work for my overlord before midsummer doth wain.
Oh you wanna ask the wealthy to pay a little more. Well I guess it never hurts to ask. Let me just see what’s in my cheque book *flips the bird* Nope!!
I don’t want a President who thinks a leg up comes from the government. I want a president who know’s a leg up comes from his dad.
Because success never comes from other people. Take me. I built this show out of nothing!! I gave it my blood, sweet, and tears and a stool sample. Viacom has a very strict drug testing program. I sacrificed, I suffered but I grew a thick skin and became a tough as nails shark who will be stopped by nothing and no one. So when you say I got help it hurts my feelings.
The only accomplishments I value are the ones I produce entirely by myself. That’s why I’m not so crazy about my children.
Now I am being told that my Peabody’s and my Emmy’s are somehow not just the work of me, but also my one hundred employees working together through brutal hours to make 161 episodes a year, with a common goal. It just makes them so meaningless.
Haha I am free. Stephen Colbert is flying solo … and commando!!
Folks, I’ve always said that relying on other people is over rated. The point is, anyone who accepts help from others, for anything, is nothing but a parasite.
And the Lord said ‘It was goood!”
Can we get an audiobook of Stephen reading the bible all sexy like? Can someone get on that please? Huge props to Dan Gross. He came out swinging, spoke passionately and just did an all around awesome job.
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Except for the passages in the Bible that drive me nuts, like 20 pages of genealogy: “and Sarah began Umlaut, son of Zebediah, and Umlaut begat Zachariah, who begat Jermoniah, cousin of Archimedes, who begat Nebechudnezzar, Frankincense, and Shapiro…” And so on.
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….except that it would be read by Stephen, who could make reading the phone book sexy, so what’s a few hours of genealogy?
LOL “Frankincense and Shapiro!”
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Yes, I loved the “sexy Bible”! I also thought Dan Gross was great, despite the fact that Stephen cut him off a lot. Here’s the website of Dan’s group, if you’d like to sign their petition against gun violence or learn more: http://www.wearebetterthanthis.org/
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Thanks for that link Caroline!
I also loved the low-tech “Word” segment (though also not the “choking” part!) and the sexy Bible was a hoot!
It was great that Stephen was able to help Mr. Gross get the word out.
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Oh my God this episode was so awesome. It’s hard to know where to begin! Loved Stephen’s low budget version of The Word (except for the choking part). Even as a one man show, we love what he does. Also, the sexy Bible reading, I was trying to figure out which passages he might pick….I thought maybe Leviticus…:)
Dan Gross, I agree, was a great guest. We have GOT to push this issue to the forefront of our political debate. I will definitely be checking out the Brady Campaign’s website.
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All I kept thinking, during the sexy bible reading part, was about that study that says late night TV might make people depressed. I was up watching the show after a bad nightmare that left me shaken, and after that segment I was all smiles and ready to go back to sleep. I don’t think he could have even depressed a rat last night!
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My favorite moment of the show (Which, I agree with Lady Helper was awesome!) was the mini character break when Stephen said, “And I will cast abominable filth upon thee…” I just about woke the neighbors laughing at the one.
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I love the 10-second rewind Hulu now has, so I can re-watch character breaks.
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There seems to be a theme of filth-related character breaks this week!
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What a solid show! That interview was so satisfying and wonderful. Stephen’s line about a “dark chestnut” tree getting shot in the forest was particularly inspired. I’m so happy that they had Dan Gross on, and he did a fantastic job explaining his position. His choice of words for why we as a nation aren’t having an intelligent discussion about gun violence was completely on point. It’s shameful, indeed.
In other show news, I loved The Word! That was a great, unique way to cover that story. And I won’t lie that it wasn’t an excellent excuse for me to enjoy Stephen’s handwriting.
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I agree with Stephen’s sentiment about instagram. I don’t get it. It makes pictures look old. So what?
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