February 18, 2014 – Brian Greene
EPISODE NUMBER: 10064 (February 18, 2014)
GUESTS: Brian Greene | Janet Mock
SEGMENTS: Intro – 2/18/14 | Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show Debut | Transgender Awareness | Transgender Awareness – Janet Mock | Brain Greene | Sign Off – Goodnight
SUIT REPORT: Deep Dark Charcoal Pinstripe Jacket | White Shirt | Grey Diamond Pattern Tie
VIDEOS: Monday, February 18, 2014
Intro – 2/18/14
Tonight, Piers Morgan gets into hot water or as they call it in England, Beer.
Then, there’s good news coming out of Iraq and that news was immediately re-deployed to Afghanistan.
My guest Brian Greene is launching a new website dedicated to science education, but how do I get the baking soda and vinegar into my hard drive?
Employers in Spain are getting rid of daytime naps. Meanwhile, employers in America are getting rid of nighttime sleep.
This is The Colbert Report.
I wonder what the segment about Iraq was? I guess it got cut for time. Also, the thing about employers in Spain cutting naps? I’ve said for years that we should have siestas in the U.S. Don’t do it Spain!
Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show Debut
Stephen not only made an appearance on Jimmy Fallon’s first Tonight Show, but made his first appearance ever on The Tonight Show. I think that people are excited that The Tonight Show is back in New York. Conan took the show 3,000 miles to the opposite coast, but Fallon took it across the hall from Studio 6A to Studio 6B at 30 Rock. So now we could see Letterman, Jon Stewart, and all the east coast people like Robert DeNiro, Tina Fey, Sarah Jessica Parker, Mayor Giuliani… and …Kim Kardashian…hmmm, may have to rethink this whole New York thing.
- Before we begin, I want to welcome my friend Jimmy Fallon to the 11:30 time slot.
- Jimmy, you’re going to do great. Everyone should check out Jimmy’s show on Fridays.
The bit Stephen was in was having everyone who said Fallon would never host the Tonight Show come out to pay off a $100 bet.
Here is Stephen mistaking Jimmy for a Coinstar machine:
- There’s Jimmy, thanking God that I’m there.
- Nation is it me or has the nation gone crazy? Everyone’s covered in tattoos, has health insurance, it’s madness.
- Nothing has me more confused than the transgenders. They’re everywhere from RuPaul’s drag race, to Glee to the Transformers movies. Hey, hey Optimus, you were born a robot. It doesn’t matter if inside you feel like you’re a truck.
- The whole thing makes my brain broke.
Facebook has come out with a list of 50 options one could choose to identify oneself as a gendered person.
- The list rounds out with pangender, neither or other. OTHER! What did I not include in that list, pirate? merperson? minaj?
- She can’t be a runway model. Not because she’s transgendered, but because she’s 28. Move it along gramma, move it along.
- Lemme get this straight…now we can’t talk about genitals? I wouldn’t have a show if I couldn’t mention my balls. They are my co-hosts, Kathie Lee and Hoda.
Author Janet Mock came onto the show to promote her book, “Redefining Realness”. She was on Piers Morgan’s show and after the show, she tweeted (in response to an on-screen graphic describing her as “a boy until age 18”) “I was not ‘formerly a man'” and also tweeted, “Get it the f*** together”.
So Stephen had her record that on a big red button so she could hit it during her interview at any point when Stephen is saying something wrong.
Only thing is, Stephen is the one who ended up hitting it, twice.
Janet: They used very problematic language that showed their lack of understanding …
Stephen: They? He’s a he. He self identifies as a single man. Don’t you identify him as anything other than a single man, that’s his choice. (Stephen hits button: “Get it the f*** together”)
To be clear, Janet, when using the words “they” and “their” is referring to Piers Morgan.
Stephen: Is it getting better for people in the trans community?
Janet: I think it is. I think that me sitting here with you as your first openly trans guest, I’m assuming, is an amazing moment, and also those 50 Facebook gender markers …
Stephen: That doesn’t seem like a lot to you?
Janet: No, actually it seems like a little. Where’s non-binary, where’s bi-gender, where’s all these different kind of options?
Stephen: That was in there too, but it’s only a half-hour show.
Well, to be fair to Facebook, they did list “other”. I somehow don’t think Ms. Mock would be too happy with that one though.
She talked about how, instead of using “she” and “he” or “him” and “her”, we should use the words, “they” and “their”, even though we are talking about one person. Stephen said, in so many words, that he’s too old for this kind of thinking. I agree with Stephen.
Stephen: What’s the most boring aspect of being transgender?
Janet: I think the most boring thing is talking to someone about how I’m telling them I identify.
Stephen: Are you bored right now? Because that’s what this entire conversation has been about.
(Stephen hits button: “get it the f*** together”)
I gotta say, from the look on her face after that question, I’m thinking she got nailed. She didn’t really have an answer, but she left with a smile and she does have a very nice smile.
Interview – Brain Greene
Brian Greene came on to promote his site, worldscienceu.com where kids and adults, I guess, can learn about science in a way that’s more accessible, with visuals and graphics and things to make it less intimidating.
Brian: I struggled as a kid trying to learn Einstein’s theories …
Stephen: Hey dummy, hey dummy.
Brian: Exactly, right.
I sympathize. Science was my worst subject in school but I wonder if I could’ve been better at it, had there been the internet and a website like this one.
Brian: If you go 99.999999999% ( I believe I counted the correct number of 9’s after the decimal point and coincidentally, I got 9) of the speed of light, you go out into space for six months, stay with me, turn around and come back you will have aged only one year, but earth will have aged 223,607 years … and when you tell that to a kid, science becomes something that they are no longer intimidated by, it’s no longer boring and it’s something that they want to know about.
Stephen’s knowledge of science shone through in this interview. I think sometimes he just can’t be the character and has to show that he knows stuff. Yet, the comedy is still there.
Stephen: So if I have a flashlight and I fire the flashlight at you, that first photon is coming at you at the speed of light, right?
Brian: It is. So’s the second one.
Stephen: …well, there may be a traffic jam or something like that. Chris Christie might put up some cones.
So go check out worldscienceu.com and “Redefining Realness”. Go on! Ga-head Ga-head!