December 11, 2012 — Malcolm Gladwell

The Colbert Report Episode GuideEPISODE NUMBER: 9036 (December 11, 2012)
GUESTS: Malcolm Gladwell
SEGMENTS: Fiscal Cliff Negotiations | ThreatDown – Commie Unicorns & Foreman Barbie | Ex-Gay Therapy Debate | Sign Off – Audra McDonald “Baby It’s Cold Outside”
SUIT REPORT: Navy suit | White Shirt | Yellow striped tie
VIDEOS: Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Audra & Stephen

At this rate, Stephen and Audra McDonald will be appearing on a Playbill on Broadway soon. Get those two a show! Seriously, I am just jealous because every time Ms. McDonald is on the show, she gets to get all snuggly with Stephen.

Let us know what you think of the ep; this is my last guide of 2012, so let me say thanks for your readership this past year, and looking forward to the next. I will be adding more to this a bit later.


  • A new threat from North Korea. How will Hawkeye and Clinger handle this one?
  • Then, can homosexuality be cured? And what will that mean for Bravo’s ratings?
  • Plus. my guest Malcolm Gladwell wrote the foreword to The New Yorker’s Big Book of Dogs. I wonder if Dog Fancy has a Big Book of Gladwells.
  • It is now legal to carry a concealed weapon in all 50 states. So if you are in one of them….be careful. This is The Colbert Report!

Fiscal Cliff Negotiations

  • It’s a special time of the year, we have been looking forward to it for months now, and everywhere you go you can see the twinkle in little children’s eyes, because they know in a few short weeks (sings) the fiscal cliff is com in’ to town! Merry Cliffmas!
  • With a dramatic name like “fiscal cliff,” it’s got to be exciting.

Fiscal Cliff Excitement

Is it over? S**t? Ok folks, I’ll admit, I don’t want to talk about the Fiscal Cliff, and you don’t want to hear about it, but for the next 20 days all pundits are contractually obligated to talk exciting budgetary policy, and you, the viewer, are obligated to listen. Check your cable contract. It’s right below the part below the part where Comcast gets your kidneys. They’ll be there to pick them up between the hours of 9 AM and 6 PM. Wear something loose.


Malcolm Gladwell

  • Malcolm Gladwell: [Dogs are] an extraordinary example of a species that we have bred on the basis of how much attention they pay to us, and how closely they look us in the eye, and how attentively they hang on every word. It’s the most narcissistic thing we have ever done as human beings.
  • Stephen: So it’s the best thing we’ve ever done….as far we are concerned, because we are the ones that are the subject of the narcissism.
  • Stephen: My dog Gipper and I are always in constant competition as to who can pay more attention to me.
  • Malcolm: I think New Yorkers worship their dogs. This is a lot of what my foreword is about, the particular status of the New York city dog…who is…pampered…whose owner feels guilty about having him in New York city. It’s this relationship defined by guilt.
  • Stephen: I think one of the most extraordinary things, the most unique things, about dogs in New York, is that this one of the few places in the world where humans also poop on the sidewalk.

Sign Off – Audra McDonald “Baby It’s Cold Outside”

Audra & Stephen II

Audra & Stephen III

  • Katt

    Here is the MP3 of tonight’s duet [Link]. If you miss any, they can all be found in our Music Archive.

  • applepies

    Stephen and Audra were sweet and flirty and that song was just great to watch. So far, this week is shaping up exactly as I hoped it would!

  • dentry

    Last night’s duet was just so wonderful to watch.

  • Sophie

    oh wow the duet was lovely and props to Audra McDonald. if I had been in her place I definitely would not have been able to remain as cool and composed as she was. they were so cute together.

  • karenatasha

    I immediately purchased this on iTunes. Since the duets are sign-offs, not web extras, they will be included in the downloads. I loved it so. An Astaire-like dancing and singing Stephen with the ever-gorgeous, ever-talented Audra McDonald. So beautifully done. Happiness.

    Hey–I’m not even Christian and I get these lovely Christmas gifts! Stephen is SO generous.

  • Jaime

    Did no one notice that Stephen messed up a line? 😉

  • applepies

    @Jamie, if he did, I was too busy imagining I was Audra to notice!